a speck of my future
my future contained in a speck
what is coming?
worlds orbit me
and i gasp at their breadth
the possibilities held in a speck
can i smile wide enough?
beyond me, beyond us
a speck of worlds
manifestations of glory
a glimpse at truth
can i anticipate well enough?
no.
i will try.
a drum sounds
the drum of life
the first sign
it's coming
they gather
anticipating
they want to be a part of it
they are a part of it
they wonder at it
how could it be
why could it be
within a rhythm
their lives brought to a speck
a speck of glory
a sigh of longing
what does it herald
only just a multitude
and we wonder
how could we be a part of this?
why are we a part of this?
this would be a funeral with lots of people
and everyone would raise their glasses
they would say hear! hear!
they would jump around
they would scream
because they know they only have one life
they would hold hands and cry
they would embrace each other
and feel the warmth of bodies on bodies
everyone would be very happy
and they would be very sad
there would be a lot of moaning
because every moment is precious
but you can’t hold them too dear
because every moment is fleeting
but every moment is one-of-a-kind
but nothing lasts
and yet maybe it will
no one would know
but we would all be together in that
the fact that no one knows
but also that we could have blind hope
and we would all try for that
to blindly hope in the moments
and over the course of time
maybe we would believe it
together, we could believe it
and together, we could be ok
even when we might hurt each other
even when we might say things
even when we might think things
we could still stand together
In that moment, and think
“we might all be ok”
“and that dead guy, maybe him too”
we could look at a small flower
we could think about it
we could feel our breaths together
and that would be enough
and then we would go home
written for a film festival submission that was rejected.
I have a to-do list item
"buy narcan"
It's been months
And I haven't done it.
I like to think
The thought mattered
I want people to see the world through my eyes
I want them to feel how I feel sometimes
To show them the beauty
To show them the sadness
I want to get these things out
Things I can't express
I don't know how
The trees
The sky
The small flowers
Heart ache
Love
A smile
Ive felt the evil of man
I know what it is to be evil and to want evil things
I've seen how a man can be evil
But again, i see the sun
And I see the tendrils of ice
I see the dog's hairs and the cat's purr
I see the green of the grass
How deep green it can be sometimes
And how easy it can be to not see that
To see someone crush the flower
It can be awful
I want to show it, I want us to see it
I don't know how i can do that
We all see different things
But I think there can be a time when we see
the same
When that will be I don't know
I only guess, and hope I will be there with
everyone
But for now,
I like to try and take a walk
Through the woods,
or even down my street.
billy stubbed his toe
but i couldn’t care less
billy started bleeding
but i didn’t want to think about it
too many things to say
too many things to want
too many things to read
too many things to do
too many things to know
too many things to think
too many things to see
too many things to be
too many things to make
too many things to appreciate.
this is my new + selected life
curated for fast + easy enjoyment
you’ll know me inside + out
an experience to “cut through the noise".
I
I got a tingly feeling
And floated to the ceiling
When the message came back
I had waited for years
Cycling through my fears
They vanished in a second
II
Your arms were like leather
I’m a pillow of feathers
Bobbing and flopping to sleep
I never touched the ground
Or even heard a sound
But my neck was warm and fuzzy
III
Pauses between what I said
As far apart as our heads
Objects closer than they appear
Eyeball glued to the mirror
She’s far enough to see her
Stubborn cheeks sore from sitting
ROUGH DRAFT
The dragon might eat my soul
If I leave my tent
I hear his breath
Through the polyester vents
His body flows around me
But he dare not enter
As if he had fetters
Scared of polyester?
I’ve been here as long as I can remember
Eating the lichen and maggots
There’s a pile of my shit
In the corner
At least there are good reads
I’ve even started some philosophy
To shed light on this mystery
About the polyester
I hear his gnashing teeth
My soul he would eat
He would savor me, oh yes
If he could get me out of this tent.
1st draft
He used to walk upon the thousand hills
‘Til the day he became truthless
He once drank of the gushing wine
Yet the Spring has dried up
Why does he accept his fate?
As if he had no choice
His faculties are in working order
But there is a missing gear
The hills are but a jaunt up
The wine merely to be tapped
If only his clouds
Would slow their rushing across the sky
A cumulonimbus blocks the light of the sun
That which fed the flourishes of the painter’s brush
The canvas is barren
There are no more worthy ideas
He is truthless.
And he doesn’t know what truth is
All the thousands of words in the thousand books
Cannot discover the mystery
Look at this buttercup... I mean really look.
Are you seeing it?
Look at the dog's hairs... There are millions. Little tiny hairs. That make up that face. Are you seeing it? Are you thinking about it? What are you thinking about?
The last of the blondes
By 2030, the blondes will be extinct
The last of them will be in Finland
I don't claim to be anything here
so don’t feel some type of way about it
hey this is a test
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